The Crazy Guy Who Busted Ass

This isn't really article material, it's just something funny that happened to me the other day. I know nobody will believe this, but I swear I am not making any of this up or exaggerating. If you have trouble following the story, there's a map at the bottom of the page to help you.

It was late at night, and my mother was about to leave the house with her boyfriend to go eat, run errands, etc. All of a sudden, we hear screeching tires and a horn start honking in front of our house. There was a maroon sedan pulled over on the side of the road parked in front of our ditch with the alarm going off. The lights are flashing, the horn is STILL honking, and the driver flings open the door and runs away. My mother was on the way to her car as this was happening, so she thought maybe it was a friend of mine coming to pick me up who was in a big hurry. She comes into the house and says, "Did someone just knock on the door?" I was puzzled and told her no. She went back outside and I busied myself doing something for a short while.

My mom and her boyfriend are looking at the still-open car door and wondering where the guy went. A few seconds later, a man comes along riding his bicycle. He rides smoothly down the street until he gets to where the car is and he falls flat on his face and skins his face and elbows in the concrete. They rush out to his aid and help him up, as he's taking inventory of his now-bloody wounds. I look out the window and see the car, the bike and the guy on the ground, and I jump to the conclusion that it was some hit-and-run and it must have been a stolen car, hence the reason the driver took off in such a hurry.I run outside in time to hear my mom ask the bike-rider, "Is this your car?" He said yes.

Nothing about this makes any sense. Let's review. He screeched to a halt in the middle of the night, left his alarm blaring, ran off down the street as fast as he could, came riding back down the same stretch of road on a bike, and crashed in the same exact place where his car was. My mom was creeped out and left, and I went inside and locked all the doors. He sat outside our house with his hood up for a while, and then left about 5 minutes later. He had been wearing a uniform shirt from a place right around the corner, so he must have been on his way to work (?) I still haven't figured out a logical reason why this guy would be doing this....

Whoever emails me with the best/funniest explanation gets a free secret-eville-gift mailed to them (assuming they trust me with their address... muahahahahaha). Email me at Seven@eville.net.